


The Beast

by Bullets_for_love



Category: The L Word
Genre: F/F, Humor, Sharmen, i don't even know what this is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-21
Updated: 2017-07-21
Packaged: 2018-12-05 00:06:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,501
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11566212
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bullets_for_love/pseuds/Bullets_for_love
Summary: Shane and Carmen are interrupted by an uninvited guest.





	The Beast

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea what this is or how it happened. I hope Shane and Carmen end up together in the reboot.

Shane’s pretty sure she’s in heaven. Carmen had come over earlier in the day and things had gotten a little heated (she blames Carmen for being such a tease.) Now she’s spread out on her bed, her girlfriend on top of her, doing downright sinful things.

It feels so fucking good.

Suddenly the feeling disappears, along with the warm body responsible for it and it takes Shane a moment to process.

“Carmen, what the fuck?” She asks, sitting up. The sight causes her to pause, her anger quickly disappearing. Carmen, completely naked has pressed herself against the far wall as much as she possibly can, a look of absolute terror covering her face as she stares, eyes wide in horror at something just over Shane’s head. She turns to look, nearly coming face to face with the reason she’s not currently having an orgasm.

There, in the middle of the wall is a huge fucking spider. It’s brown and hairy, and it’s just standing there like it owns the whole damn place.

Shane stares at it.

It stares back.

Neither one moves.

“I am so outta here” Carmen mumbles, not even bothering to grab her clothes as she flees from the uninvited guest.

“Well shit” Shane mumbles, wondering if she even has a shoe big enough to deal with this beast. As if reading her thoughts said beast chooses that exact moment to suddenly bolt, disappearing behind the dresser. Shane smirks for a moment, pleased that she’s managed to stare it down but it quickly turns into a frown when she realises it’s going to be a lot more difficult to get rid of it now. It could still be behind the dresser, under it, it could have gotten into one of the drawers…

Into her clothes.

Fuck.

Shane signs, running a hand through her hair as she mentally curses the beast and it’s horrible timing. She gets up, careful to keep an eye on the dresser in case it decides to come out again as she finds her discarded shirt and underwear. Her pants seem to have disappeared for the moment so she doesn’t bother, quickly grabbing one of her shoes and placing it on the bed for quick spider extermination. She checks the sides of the dresser first, in case it’s crawled out but there’s no sign of the beast. She takes both corners and pulls, muscles straining as she slowly drags the heavy dresser out enough for her to see behind it. There’s still no sign of it and she sighs, glancing towards the door as she hears hesitant footsteps.

A still very naked Carmen appears, arms wrapping around her torso as she leans against the doorway, her eyes darting around the room, looking for any sign of the intruder. Finding none they land on Shane and she shrugs a shoulder in response.

“It ran behind here. It hasn’t come out, so you can grab some clothes if you want” she says, realising Carmen’s probably cold. She nods hesitantly, slowly shuffling into the room as she eyes the dresser like it’s about to jump out and attack her. Shane’s pretty sure laughing at Carmen right now would put her in her bad book for at least the next week so she holds back, pressing her lips together to try and hide her smile. Thankfully Carmen’s far too preoccupied to notice and, as much as Shane is enjoying the sight of her girlfriend shuffling around the room as she picks up her discarded clothes, she decides it’s best to go back to spider hunting. Maybe they can get back to their previous activities after.

She still can’t see the beast and Shane lets out a frustrated sigh, realising it’s probably in the dresser somewhere and she's either going to have to pull everything out or go to the store and buy a bug bomb.

Carmen lets out an ear splitting scream from behind her and Shane quickly turns, catching sight of the completely terrified look on Carmen's face as she frantically tugs at her shirt. Before Shane even has a chance to help her a brown shape darts out and onto Carmen's arm. She stands completely frozen for a moment, shirt half off, staring in horror before her eyes roll back into her head and her body goes completely limp as she faints.

Shane rushes over, but she’s too late to catch her and she hits the ground, her head connecting with a horrible thump. Shane frantically crouches down beside her and she gently rolls her onto her back and pulls out her arm, where it had been trapped in an awkward position under her. It didn’t appear to be twisted thankfully, but it was covered in the squashed remains of the spider.

“Carm?” Shane says softly, kneeling beside her and gently cupping her cheek. Her eyes flutter, brows crinkling as she slowly regains consciousness.

“Hey, shhhh you’re ok” She says as brown eyes open, blinking in confusion.

“Wh…What happened?” Carmen mumbles groggily, reaching up to grab her head in pain. Shane, realising a second too late her arm’s covered in spider guts tries to stop her but she’s too late. Carmen’s eyes widen, adrenalin flooding her system and she bolts upright, frantically swiping at her arm.

“Get it off, get it off, oh god please, get rid of it.”

“Stop, it’s alright, hey Carm look at me.” She grabs Carmen’s wrists, holding on as she tries to fight her before going still, her muscles trembling as she fights the desperate need to get it off. She looks at Shane, tears in her eyes and Shane's heart slowly breaks.

“Everything’s going to be ok, I just need you to trust me.” Carmen nods, then winces as the movement makes her dizzy. Shane frowns, wondering if she hit her head hard enough to cause a concussion. There’s no way to find out with Carmen in this condition so she lets go, wrapping one arm around Carmen’s waist and sliding the other under her knees. Carmen wraps the non-spider covered arm around Shane's neck, holding the other out straight, as far away from herself as she can.

“Don’t look at it” Shane mumbles into her hair and Carmen turns, resting her head against Shane’s shoulder. She carries her to the bathroom and gently places her in the bathtub, carefully pulling her shirt off completely, glad Carmen hadn’t noticed the spider remains that were stuck to the back.

She nudges Carmen’s legs away from the drain as she turns the tap on, letting the water heat up. She adjusts it slightly, so it’s not too hot and she gently takes Carmen’s hand, guiding her arm under the water. Carmen watches as the spider’s remains circle the drain, Shane gently wiping off the stubborn bits.

“There, all better” Shane says, wondering how she’s going to wash the rest off Carmen’s back, where her shirt had failed to protect her without her panicking.

“Can you turn around for me?” She asks and Carmen gives her a confused look.

“I just need to wash your back for a moment” she says, and Carmen immediately stiffens, her eyes widening. Shane prepares to grab her before she panics but she takes a deep breath, remaining completely ridged as she awkwardly turns.

Shane lets out the breath she had been holding, cupping her hands under the tap and splashing the water over her back, gently washing off the bits that were stuck. Once her back is clean she grabs a stray leg that was stuck to Carmen’s underwear, watching it disappear down the drain before she puts the plug in.

“It’s all gone now” She says and Carmen lets out a relieved sigh. Shane sits on the edge of the bath, watching her girlfriend carefully. Her arms are wrapped around her knees and she’s shivering slightly as she stares straight ahead.

“Do you want me to get in with you?" She asks, wondering if she’s said the wrong thing when Carmen doesn’t respond.

“Carm?”

“Yes” her voice is so quiet Shane almost doesn’t hear it over the sound of the running water. She quickly strips off, sliding in behind Carmen, leaving as much distance as she can so Carmen can decide if she wants to be held. After a moment she leans back and Shane wraps her arms around her, gently pulling her closer. Carmen settles against her and sighs, closing her eyes as the tension slowly leaves her body.

“Does your head hurt?” Shane asks softly.

“Yeah, but it’s not too bad” she replies and Shane relaxes slightly.

“Good, I was worried you had a concussion or something.”

“I’m ok, just uh, stay with me for a while?” She sounds hesitant and vulnerable. It pulls at Shane’s heart and she hugs Carmen tighter.

“Of course. I’m right here and I’m not going anywhere. No spiders are gonna get past me.” Carmen chuckles, wrapping her arms around Shane’s.

“Thank-you.”

She kisses the top of Carmen’s head.

“Anytime.”


End file.
